im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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