He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
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It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
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He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.