Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
It's a pity Stephen Hawking can't do sarcasm.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
Randomize
