He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
Randomize
