The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
Randomize
