We're like a lot better than the average bears
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
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