I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
my "about me" section on Facebook should read "hell-bound alcoholic who wants to fuck a 40-year-old crackhead"
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
Randomize