Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
Literally I woke up the other day and the girl part of me was like “GET CUFFED MOTHERFUCKER” and I went ham on tinder.
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
Randomize
