Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
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