Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
Randomize
