fml, blew my nose and red sprinkles came out and did the splits when i sneezed
I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
You were trust falling into bushes
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
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