Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
woke up naked, gf gone. There is a cup of change in the fridge, a bird in the bathroom, and odie is drawn on my ceiling. I live in a non sequitur
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
Fell in the ditch running from the pizza guy I stole the pizza from. If you are still at my house come find me, pretty sure I need stitches.
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
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