So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
Randomize
