If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
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