Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
