So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
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