I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He sent me a 2am email the just said "Ping". Nerdiest booty call ever.
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
Randomize