you didnt know i had herpes?
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
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