if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
Randomize
