On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
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