tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
Randomize
