Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
It's fucking 2020, I should be able to watch Netflix in the buff while making brownies without you getting preachy about it.
Randomize
