Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
I wish I only lived at night.
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
I woke up to three texts telling me to "go fuck myself," a panicked voicemail from my mom, and a girl thanking me... I'm not sure which I should take care of first
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
Dude, I need a lifestyle change. I'm to old to be making out with chicks in foam parties, letting older chicks get all excited because I let them put their hands up my shirt, and running around doing scavenger hunts with 18 yr old chicks.
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
Randomize
