i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
I tried to smoke out of half a banana, and lit my nose hair on fire. So I feel like that sums up my life pretty well.
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
Randomize
