it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
At the hospital, the nurse kept telling me that i either had appendicitis, a tubular pregnancy, or an ovarian cyst. I kept asking if i could just have chlamydia instead...
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
Oh honey. I will not JUST be drunk. I will be spring break drunk. Spectacularly hammered. It will be glorious for all watching and embarrassing for anyone that has to drag me to bed.
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
Randomize
