we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
Randomize
