She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
Tonight I learned to never try to impress your ex by dancing on the stripper pole while drunk. That’s how you end up in the ER
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
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