Woke up with feathers in my hair. at work. still drunk. sooo awkward.
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
Sex in the backyard? Check.
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
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