No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
she gave me a handjob in the middle of the night and my stomach growled so she walked out totally naked and came back 5 minutes later with two sandwiches. who the fuck says getting married is awful?
How's work?
Spinning.
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
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