Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
Whats spookier? Halloween or waking up to a drunk text from your ex telling you how awesome you are at 2am
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
Randomize
