hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
