What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
Apparently I told his new girlfriend to stop swallowing because she's getting fat. Oh, and I yelled this across a large room
When you text me tomorrow to remind me to mail your parking pass, also remind me to make sure i did NOT pack my vibrator for this family vacation
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
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