I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
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