i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
how do you play pong handcuffed?
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
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