i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
Im blasting "Fat Bottom Girls" as loud as humanely possible in attempts that old ladies doing water aerobics will take the hint and get the fuck out of the pool.
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
Randomize
