That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
Use "feeling words"
Yay
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
Randomize
