Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
being pregnant is like rehab
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
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