my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
so, my congressman just called me to say he has office hours this week if i'm still interested in talking to him. i pray to god this is not related to Friday.
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
Randomize