make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
our cab driver is having phone sex.
I drunkenly recorded an episode of Family Matters last night. I took a shot everytime Carl Winslow had a mustache.
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.
I've been eating like all day, let me suffer my one 'Dear lord, I'm the size of a small whale. One that doesn't even need to find being killed by illegal whaling because I'm not even big enough to provide an decent blubber, but still big enough to be considered for a brief moment.' moment in peace.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
I just noped my wife on Tinder. Turns out I was the second one to find out that we both have it.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
Randomize
