ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a Chick-Fil-A breakfast sandwich. How's your Monday?
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
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