Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
Day 3 of Lent and I would already kill a puppy if God would give me permission to masturbate
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
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