his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
This lady gave me four cups to go along with my gallon of daiquiri. Silly girl, all I need is a straw.
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
Update on my sex life: my calves are sore from masturbating too much. It's a thing. Look it up.
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
Randomize
