Well douche your snatch and let's go!
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
Randomize
