my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
23 Adults Confess The Irrational Fears They Had When They Were Kids
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
These 25 Women First Experienced Sexual Harassment At A Shocking Age
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend