I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
No more vodka shots for you. Last night you begged a man on your knees to sell you his beard. He had no beard.
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
Randomize