I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
The barista asked if I wanted my drink wet or dry, but all that came to mind was farts. You have ruined me.
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
He’s actually a personal trainer. He said he hasn’t taught yoga in a while but the stripper prefers to introduce him as a yoga teacher
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