I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
I just cleaned your Jaeger vomit off my car with a knife. Don't ever say I don't love you.
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
my taxi driver is listening to 50 shades of grey audiobook. this is uncomfortable.
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
Randomize
