Jesus wouldn't steal pop tarts. So why did you?
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...
Every time I type "should" my phone autocorrects to "shouldn't". even my phone knows my ideas are terrible.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
I'm sobbing to NWA
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
Randomize