When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
I bought a fake diamond ring to wear, not only to bars to keep the creeps away, but so that I'll be judged less by the front desk girl at Planned Parenthood
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
Randomize