so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
Randomize
