My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
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