ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
He asked to "fluff my boner.."
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
so my phone autocorrects 'retard' to 'retaaahd'. i LOVE being a masshole!
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
Randomize
