i think i have two assholes
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
Man, jail baloney is awful.
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
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